Kort Nytt

Palestinian Monopoly

– The game where the rules always change!


The video above is a sketch called ”Hurry up and wait: Palestinian Monopoly”. It was broadcast in September 2013. It’s in French, so here is a translation of the dialogue:


Player 1: Hey, you want to play a game?

Player 2: Sure, what is it?

Player 1: It?s called Palestinian Monopoly!

Player 2: I don?t know it.

Player 1: It?s easy, I?ll teach you. First we divide the territory cards equitably: 15 for me and 2 for you.

Player 2: But I don?t feel like playing?

Player 1: But you have no choice. [rolls dice] Eight! I?m going to build on this land in East Jerusalem.

Player 2: But you don?t have the right to build, it?s not your land!

Player 1: Ah yes, sorry, well, it?s too late. I already built.

Player 2: Ok, well my turn [rolls dice] Three! Take a ?Chance? card: ?The United Nations passes a resolution giving you back one territory and you get to draw another card.? [pulls card] Bad luck. It says ?The United States vetoes the resolution. Give back 8 more territories.?

Player 1: My turn! [rolls dice] Double 6! I buy the electricity company and now I can annoy Gaza by constantly turning the power on and off.

Player 2: Ok, my turn [rolls] ? a two ? Nablus. I buy and build a little village.

Player 1: My turn! Twelve!

Player 2: But you didn?t even roll the dice!

Player 1: No need! I bulldoze your village and build a colony of 17 houses.

Player 2: But you don?t have the right! It?s in the rules!

Player 1: But who cares about the rules? I roll a seven, pass Go and collect four million dollars.

Player 2: But it?s normally just two thousand shekels.

Player 1: Yeah, for you.

Player 2: Ok, my turn [rolls]. Seven [begins moving piece] ? one .. two? what the? What?s this wall?

Player 1: You can?t go any further.

Player 2: I have no chance. When does this game finish?

Player 1: Never!

 

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